Chapter Eighteen: When a Stranger Calls
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We kick off this week’s Riverdale with the shock telephone name that ended the final episode. Yes, it’s the Black Hood, and he forbids Betty to inform the police and even Jughead that they’ve spoken. If she does, let’s simply say he is aware of the precise location of the farm the place perma-pregnant, very murderable Polly has been hiding out. Betty asks Archie — who’s welcome again at Riverdale High since posting an apology video, which we don’t get to look at, however which I consider in my coronary heart was additionally filmed in opposition to a background of shirtless teenagers in fuchsia masks — to stroll her to highschool. She rapidly spills her guts to him about her undesirable new good friend.
Meanwhile, after the rumble with the Bulldogs and an anti-southside op-ed by Alice “Make Riverdale Great Again” Cooper, the Serpents aren’t feeling precisely neighborly. Jughead realizes that F.P. was conserving the gang in line, so he’ll should step up and take his dad’s place to forestall them from going to conflict. If he survives Serpent initiation, that’s. The first stage is the “guardianship of the Beast,” who proves to be a candy, shaggy canine. In the subsequent, Jughead should memorize a collection of Serpent legal guidelines and scream them into Tall Boy’s face. As somebody who’s able to (a) caring for a canine, and (b) reciting the Girl Scout Promise, I used to be briefly satisfied that I needs to be anointed Grand Supreme Serpent Queen, however then Jughead needed to seize a knife from a (venom-less, however nonetheless) rattlesnake coiling across the blade, and now I’m much less .
Betty’s telephone rings once more. (That “Lollipop” ringtone is getting actual previous, actual fast.) The Black Hood says he’ll e mail her one thing to publish in The Blue and Gold to show her loyalty. If she does it, she will ask him any query she likes. An previous, yellowed entrance web page of the Riverdale Register seems in her inbox, with the headline “Southside Teen Arrested and Released on Bail.” The accompanying picture is none aside from a really younger, very Twin Peaks-y Alice Cooper. Betty is torn: Publishing the entrance web page would destroy her mom’s credibility. On the opposite hand, Alice is being an unlimited jerk. When Sheriff Keller reviews that handwriting specialists decided that two completely different individuals wrote Alice and Betty’s Black Hood letters, Alice accuses her daughter of writing the message she acquired herself. Aaaand with that, Operation Publish Mom’s Old Incriminating Mugshot is a go.
At least she’s earned the fitting to ask a query. The Black Hood received’t let Betty ask his title, so she asks if she’d acknowledge his face. She would. Quid professional quo, Clarice. “I’m selfish, Betty. I don’t like sharing you with other people,” the Black Hood tells her. She can begin by chopping Veronica out of her life. Wait, maintain on: Given Sheriff Keller’s findings, is Betty not going to contemplate even for a second that the one that’s been calling her won’t be the precise Black Hood? Nev and Max wouldn’t let this slide on Catfish. Also, control Betty’s ponytail all through this episode. It’s like a canine’s tail: Her hair hangs decrease and decrease as her emotional well-being declines.
Potential traders for the Lodges’ SoDale challenge are on their option to attend a swanky open home, together with the St. Clairs and their son Nick, Veronica’s previous good friend from New York. Veronica’s mother and father encourage their Junior Businesswoman of America to promote Nick on the deal, as a result of he in flip will promote his father. If Nick St. Clair wasn’t cryogenically frozen in a storage locker leased by the CW since Gossip Girl went off the air, then he’s a number who wandered out of the Bret Easton Ellis–themed model of Westworld. He’s inappropriately flirty with Veronica and, generally, would possibly as effectively have “CREEPY RICH WEIRDO” delicately embroidered on his creepy wealthy brow.
Nick invitations the entire gang minus Jughead — and together with the Pussycats, Reggie, and Cheryl — to a celebration in his resort room, the place everybody sits in a circle whereas Nick regales them with an extended, boring anecdote about Gal Gadot, probably probably the most boring celeb you possibly can inform an extended, boring anecdote about. (No offense, Gal Gadot.) Then Nick opens his jacket to disclose a stash of Jingle Jangle. Veronica — feeling pressured to please Nick, because the Lodge household’s appointed good-time Fredo — is reluctantly in, as is Archie, as is everybody however Betty.
What is Jingle Jangle, precisely? MDMA? The music will get louder and everybody, usually, will get dancier and make-outier. Cheryl is flipping her hair round like that Herbal Essences business that aired earlier than she was born. Kevin is mainly Ron Swanson on Snake Juice. Sober Betty seems on, soberly. She additionally takes this chance to torch her relationship with Veronica, saying to everybody that she is a “privileged, shallow, airhead party girl,” a faux good friend who solely hangs out with them due to circumstance. Ouch.
It will get worse: Once everybody leaves, Nick comforts Veronica by attempting to bang her. She rebuffs his uncomfortably handsy advances and he calls her a “tease.” When Nick threatens to sabotage the deal between their mother and father if she doesn’t comply, she slaps him.
If Betty thought pushing Veronica away was onerous, she’s in for one more degree of harm. The subsequent friendship excommunication that the Black Hood orders is … Jughead. By this level, Betty isn’t even carrying a ponytail, however a low bun, which is perhaps motive sufficient to hurry her to the closest emergency room. She begs Archie to do the dumping for her. He breaks the information to Jug at his trailer, simply because the Serpents arrive for the ultimate stage of his initiation: beating the hell out of him.
At the Lodges’ fancy-pants social gathering for SoDale, which is able to wipe the southside off the map in favor of regardless of the in-universe equal of Whole Foods is, Hal Cooper exhibits as much as cowl the occasion alone, telling Hiram that Alice determined to remain dwelling and hold a low profile post-scandal. Sorry, not so quick — Alice Cooper was simply ready to make her wonderful entrance in a deeply low-cut, fiery-red, floor-length snake-print dress-cape-shorts combo (with matching clutch!) that my mortal mind doesn’t have the vocabulary to explain. The of entirety: a gold serpent necklace. She marches in and tells her husband to “shove it.” I don’t totally perceive what’s going on right here, however I do know that I like it.
Nick apologizes to Veronica, explaining that he’s been out and in of rehab over the previous few months. Could Nick be … not horrible? Just kidding. Nick is extraordinarily horrible. He slips one thing into Cheryl’s drink, and because the Pussycats ft. Veronica carry out “Out Tonight” from Rent for some motive, he leads the hardly acutely aware Blossom heiress as much as his room. Well, this can be a horrifying growth. The Pussycats, thank God, see this occurring from the stage, giving chase and bursting into Nick’s suite as their tune confusingly continues to play. The women give Nick St. Clair the identical remedy Jughead is getting from the Serpents, with the benefit of excessive heels to kick with. Cheryl is decided to press fees for tried rape and make Nick endure; Veronica can’t think about what number of occasions her ex-friend will need to have achieved this earlier than.
Over on the southside, a bloodied however victorious and newly single Jughead is rocking a brand new Serpents tattoo on his shoulder. He and Toni make out to Harry Styles’s “Sign of the Times” in his trailer, as you do. I’m genuinely frightened for the welfare of the actress who performs Toni, ought to the #bughead devoted discover out her dwelling deal with.
Betty’s telephone rings once more. I’ll provide you with one guess as to who’s calling. She did her half with Jughead, and now she calls for to know who the Black Hood actually is. He directs her to an deserted home on the fringe of Fox Forest, the place she goes, alone, as a result of regardless of being extraordinarily clever, Betty can be deeply silly. There’s a black field tied up with a crimson bow ready for her inside. It comprises a black hood of her very personal. Over the telephone, he instructs her to place it on, then flip round. Behind her is … a mirror? Uh, why? “To show you that we’re the same,” he explains. Black Hood, this life lesson is lame as hell. When she hears a loud creak, Betty flees the home.
But she and the Black Hood nonetheless have “unfinished business.” He is aware of she’s been telling Archie all the pieces. Now, he’ll kill Polly and her complete household except she names one other sinner who deserves dying by his hand. “Nick St. Clair,” she solutions. Honestly, Betty, wonderful alternative.