My fiance wants me to give my padded six a job in order to work in his cushion company. Should I ask him to pay me?


Dear Manishi,

My fiance owns a very successful landscaping company, which is about five years old. I have been in corporate banking for 15 years. My fiancé and I are discussing about leaving our cushion six-figure job and helping them in their business. My question is, can I ask him to pay me?

Right now, he pays all the bills and I put the money in a joint savings account for us with the help of groceries, cleaning lady, etc., which makes it exciting to help him “shop” and get the speed / scenery. Would be a nice change of. I just want to make sure that I am / We are determining the best way to do it.

We don’t have a wedding date set yet (COVID, ugh!) But I prefer to leave my job / career after getting officially married. I think it’s safe like this? We are also discussing a retrospective agreement, but I think that is another question!

He feels that we can make it more easily through his business (with my help) than in our six-figure job, but I have never earned a salary. Is it fair that I ask for a salary, or just help him grow the business if he continues to pay for everything? Just down the road wondering if things go sideways, I set myself up to be quite protected.

Am I thinking this?

Curious in Missouri

Rich: My sister-in-law moved in with her mother, changed her will, established a new faith and inherited everything. Is it too late to claim what is our right?

Dear Curious,

Your final question is the easiest answer. No, you are not finished thinking that. You are asking everyone the right questions, and your concerns (if that’s what they are) are well established. But before I raise your first question about asking him about salary, I have a question for you. Do you enjoy your job and freedom? Be very careful about leaving a profession that pays well and one that you have worked hard for and gives you a different creative, social and intellectual outlet.

It serves two very important objectives in your life: it gives you a different identity to your husband, financial independence, and it divides the financial risk of the two. If people decide that they cannot tolerate landslides during COVID-19, it will be your salary to trust both of you. If his job goes away, you will expect that his job will also go away. He is obviously very excited about his business, but it is five years old and it is important not to let his enthusiasm (nee ego) go into his work life as well.

Rich: My mother wishes that her lover could live in her house after she died. Can I still take it out if the deed is transferred to me?

Bottom Line: Think long and hard about this decision and wait until you get married to make it. You should not take it before marriage nor should you take it as your sole source of income, any future opportunity for your job and promotion, before you agree on a pre-agreed agreement. These are all slices of the same pie. I hope you have the wedding you’ve always dreamed of if and / or when a vaccine is available.

But more importantly, I hope you have a marriage and a fantasy of life for yourself. If you were one with the landscaping business, would you ask him to quit his six-figure job? This question is worth asking.

You can email Dhanwan at [email protected] with any financial and ethical questions related to coronavirus

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