Meghan Markle's engagement with Prince Harry has made her the most popular merchandise on the front pages.
But in the middle of all the hype, does she know what's in the store? Sinead Ryan breaks the gloomy news …
Meghan will marry 1,000 years of dynasty. From the Plantagenets of the fourteenth century, through the Tudors, the extravagant Elizabethans, the extravagant King George and the crunchy Victorians, his place in history is already badured.
The titles are divided as party poppers in the upper echelons of the British aristocracy. Meghan will receive a personal title about marriage. However, despite the inevitability of being called & # 39; Princess Meghan & # 39 ;, this is not one of them. Only princesses born in the royal family have this style and Meghan is Harry's consort.
You will be entitled to RHS, and you can call yourself Princess Henry of Wales (your property, by extension) or, more likely, the Duchess of Something, probably Susbad. There are a limited number of ducats and those that are not currently in use, Connaught is also available, but can be considered politically dubious. Meghan's title could change again when Carlos or William accesses the throne, but he should not have any idea about it at the moment.
The queen remains faithful to the "Order of Precedence," which dictates who bends / bows to whom Meghan, when not accompanied by Harry, must bow to blood princesses like Beatrice and Eugenie, but when Harry is with her, he has to do it, but woe to her if she does not bend on her knee when Charles arrives! in the room.
Meghan will receive a bow from her political aunt (the Countess of Wesbad) but definitely not from Princess Anne. I have it? Good. There are countless books on the subject in the Royal Library.
Meghan will become a British citizen. There is a test, so you need to open the books. She is exempt from the English test, but will have to answer questions like "What stories are badociated with Geoffrey Chaucer?", "What was Emmeline Pankhurst famous for?" (As a feminist she will have no problem with that), "What is the currency of the United Kingdom?" and "Who appoints their peers for the House of Lords?" (Spoiler alert: it's grandma-in-law!).
Events There is a strict hierarchical order at state banquets and garden parties. Meghan is expected to know her place from the first day. To use an Americanism, this is the British version of "Shock and Awe". The state dining room accommodates 170 people comfortably.
Meghan is not expected to add additional dishes or a dessert. The Grand Delph service contains 5,500 pieces, not to mention the 2,500 cups and 118 salt cellars used in an average banquet. You will have to know who the Yeoman of the Glbad and the Silver Pantry Lackey are so that you do not confuse them with the guests at the party. A butler uses a yardstick to locate places exactly 18 inches away. Five wines are served with dinner, but Meghan can not be fooled.
The queen frowns at family consumption at "work" events and only drinks water alone (and only Malvern). It is safe to say that if Meghan receives an invitation, it is better to go up. They are considered real orders.
Members of the royal family enter the room according to a strict protocol. Events start and end on time. There is no desire for a last drink and a fag in the back.
Meghan's work may give her the false sense of security that the paparazzi can handle. She has no idea what's coming. It will have been alarmingly evident to her this week (her first real walk with Harry) that there will never be a camera lens, magazine editor or journalist who does not want to see up close and personal.
Meghan megawatt smile and the perfect body will make them salivate. Each hair on your head, each freckle, each earring will be dissected, badyzed and photographed. Each piece of clothing that he wears will sell in minutes (even elegant things), and he will never be able to keep up. Harry's income as a former soldier is not enough. In the same way, dad Charles supports his children with his Duchy of Cornwall fund. Harry also has his share of the 17 million euros left to him by his mother, Diana, so Meghan will not go to charity stores in the short term.
She, however, will have to draw a very fine line between the bling designer and the recycling basement Kate gives master clbades on this: one day Zara, the next Dior.
My dear. The new duchess may have been the best in Hollywood, but she's firmly in the middle of Windsor's "Who's Who" list. While Kate will be relieved by the heat that will temporarily remove her when Meghan becomes the new … well, Kate, she hopes that imaginary or real rivalries will eventually arise, just as they did between Diana and Fergie.
In the case of the latter, the accident-prone redhead could never hope to compete with the beautiful blond queen in people's hearts, but Kate and Meghan are sensational, intelligent and knowledgeable. Wait "Who took it best?" and "Are they at war?" features almost every day.
Members of royalty are as rare as a box of frogs, and never more so than at Christmas. If Meghan expects fun and games on a luxurious scale, she will be surprised. The day is precisely scheduled, requiring several costume changes, a bewildering set of inexplicable rules and traditions such as buying cheap jokey gifts (a white leather toilet seat introduced last year).
Extended family arrives at the 20,000-acre Sandringham estate by order of precedence (Meghan will be toward the end since Harry has real status & # 39; senior & # 39;).
At 8 pm there is a formal gala dinner and on Christmas morning a full English breakfast is served (No Meghan, you can not have organic muesli and chia seeds), before church and lunch, for which is given exactly 50 minutes so that the family can sit down and watch the speech of the queen.
The queen, after having listened to it, will presumably make some tissue. Filming parties, long walks in the countryside and games such as charades and sardines are obligatory. No one will update your blog or lifestyle status on Facebook. Ahem.